The Scarlett Letters - Football

Ash' Kickin Wednesday

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 10:15:00 -0600

We interrupt Scarlett’s planned romantic status updates and relationship rantings in order to discuss a much more important topic.

While responsible Americans nationwide came out in record numbers to support their presidential nominees yesterday, today those results are in. The votes are tallied. And with the possible exception of New Mexico, where indecision and questionable choices seem to be statewide epidemics – the news rooms are a buzz with decision returns.

However, Super/Fat Tuesday PALES in comparison to Ash' Kickin'-Signing-Wednesday! It’s better than Christmas! Instead of unwrapping DVDs, bottles of wine and a new Mac laptop under my tree, I get brand new football players clad in Michigan uniforms!! WEE HEE!!

(For the majority of my female readers who have no idea what I’m talking about, let me briefly explain: National Football Signing Day is the first day that high school recruits can actually sign their letters of intent to attend and play at a certain school. Some players change their mind at the last minute from their non-binding oral agreements, and for others the signing is just a formality as their decisions were made long ago.)

Michigan lost a lot of power this year along with Coach Carr we said goodbye to Adrian Arrington (WR), Mike Hart (RB), Mario Manningham (WR), Chad Henne (QB), Jake Long (OL) and Shwn Crable (OLB). So today’s decisions will be critical.

The most important, however, will not take place as promised today, unfortunately. #1 recruit, Terrelle Pryor is still too busy playing with his Barbie dolls to decide exactly where he will go to school (Ohio State, Penn State and Michigan being the alleged front runners). I'm just kidding about the Barbie's Terrelle - I promise (cute smile) - please don't hold it against Michigan - we love you. We really do. I"m SURE the Barbie's are just there to date your GI-I-Joes.

Toy preferences and proclivities aside, Pryor is about as versitle as they come: playing the positions of QB, WR, TE, OL and Safety. Pryor stands at 6ft 6’ and is an athletic running QB (perfect for R2’s offensive plans). In 2007, he threw for 1,889 yards and 23 touchdowns, rushed for 1,889 yards and scored 35 touchdowns. (For you gals that don’t know…that’s impressive). So cross your fingers, rub a rabbit's foot, say a hail mary, ask for heath ledger's intervention, drink a beer (hey - we all have our good luck charms!) - just hope we get him.

Our second guy to watch is defensive end Nick Perry, a native Michigan (Detroit) boy who will choose between UofMand USC today (a seemingly easy decision: the standard and prestige of the Big 10 vs. the cake walk of the PAC 10). Perry set the state record with 26 sacks and led his school to the first state title for a Detroit Public School League.

I haven't been THIS excited since the first time I put on my cheerleading uniform! [Scarlett waves her maize & blue pom poms]

I don’t know why people keep talking about these McCain and Obama persons and silly things like delegate counts when there are football stats to be compared! Frankly, I wonder sometime where people’s priorities really are!?

Go Blue!

I recommend the following sites to keep you abreast of the action:

It's UnAmerican, Dammit!

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Tue, 10 Oct 2006 14:49:00 -0500

I HAD to blog about the game....otherwise 66 would have sent out the special victims unit to check my apartment for dead bodies!

This weekend the battle for the Paul Bunyan Trophy took place. Now unlike my extreme malice towards worthy (and not so worthy) opponents such as ND and Ohio State I don’t have any real hatred for the Spartans. Now when I was 6 and had a crush on little Kenny Cooper, who was a HUGE state fan, I decided that I would hate MSU so that we’d had something to argue about or something. Who knows what goes through the mind of a love struck 2nd grader.

Anyway, as my age and knowledge of football have increased I know that the Big Ten is better when State does well, College Football is better when State does well…hell – the state of Michigan is better when State does well (which leads to a stronger United States and the promotion of democracy throughout the world!). It’s for the greater success of mankind that State get off its butt and hire a good coach for once!

Anyway, so the Spartans were hosted in Ann Arbor this weekend and even after their sorry sorry performance during their Irish Match-up and blew a 30-point lead, I was still a little bit nervous going in.

State is like a pissed off girlfriend - you're pretty sure you'll still get some but its never 'easy'. Michigan’s stellar defense showed up for the game however. Awarding only 2 touchdowns to their 4. And while Michigan IS fierce this year, I believe the Spartans could have made a better showing. MSU is, has been and will forever be a very emotional team. It’s all completely mental for them and ND crushed whatever gumption, bravery, or balls (pardon the expression) this team had and trampled it all over Lansing. They were so busy pouting from last week that they forgot they were even on the field this week!

I’m thinking only of the fate of humanity when I say this, people: someone needs to take this trophy and give every one of them a swift kick in the @ss! Or whatever the athletic equivalent of prozac is!

If the Spartans fought like this during the battle of Thermopylae, we'd all be speaking Persian right now! (MAJOR bonus points if you know what I'm talking about).

********

In other news, I got new glasses this weekend. 4 of my guy friends have already told me they make me look like a “sexy librarian”. Are librarian’s supposed to be sexy?

Amazing Disgrace

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Wed, 27 Sep 2006 20:48:00 -0500

Do you hear that sucking sound?? Listen closely….. It’s the sound of Brady Quinn kissing the Heisman goodbye!!

That’s right. The Michigan Wolverines dominated….no..they SPANKED the irish in the highest point total by an opponent in Notre Dame Stadium in 46 years, and the first time Michigan has won in South Bend in 12 years!!! You might be saying, now Red, you’re an irish girl! You went to Notre Dame Prep* for high school! Why in the world would you be happy that that got the ASS KICKING of a lifetime!? Well, I'll tell ya. #1. Because I come from a proud Wolverine legacy - a family filled with UofM alums. #2. Because most ND fans didn’t go there…they don’t even know anyone that went there and they’ve never even been to South Bend (because if they had, there’s no WAY they would be able to respect ND), just because they’re irish or Catholic they’re fans #3. Growing up in such proximity to two rival teams breeds a unique strain of animosity #4. ND fans are PERTICULARLY obnoxious #5. RUDY SUCKS!

For those of you that missed the fierce looking Wolverines (a team with college football’s all-time leader in winning percentage I might add) the final score was 47-21…hehehehe. Yesterday was better than Christmas! I gathered with beloved Michigan Alums at the Pour House on Capitol Hill … and boy did we party! Now my friends, you have not watched a football game until you’ve watched one filled with loud, friendly, laid back, drunk and elated Wolverine fans chanting, singing the fight song, benching girls above their heads while counting the number of points scored, bringing people to the front of the room and giving them beers to chug, and spontaneously chanting such rhythmic phrases as:

Fuck – The – Irish; O-ver-rat-ted; and It’s great to be a Wolverine

Oooooo, it was sweet my friends. Nothing makes me feel at home like Michigan football and damn…what a homecoming!

*So calling the school because it was filled with ND faculty brats, was located about 6 blocks from Notre Dame campus, and something insane like 80% of graduates go to either Holy Cross, St. Mary’s, or ND. Hail to the Victors Back in Business! Don't Call it a Comback!